You can’t make this stuff …

Brian: we should come up with one for you and Carrie

Matt: we could be MC

Matt: like as if we were rappers

Matt: that would be cool, because then we could “throw down” and “keep it real” and “hizzy the plozzy”

Brian: how about catty catty gummat bubblecarrie matty fork

Attention Old Sad …

The Old Sad Bastards club will be meeting this Wednesday, 9 PM, at Green Dolphin Street. Put on your dance shoes and meet us so that Carrie can practice open tuck-turns.

You’re outta here

George Steinbrenner Fires Tigers

“He’s the Boss—he owns the Yankees, and that gives him the right to fire whoever he wants,” shortstop Derek Jeter said. “The Yankees have a long tradition of winning, and the Detroit Tigers failed to respect that.”

This says everything about the Yankee mentality …